Hel Hath No Fury

Love is weird, isn't it? A mysterious and powerful perversion of natural instincts, the most innocent and pure elation of the human mind, capable of bringing two distinct animals together through a force incomprehensible to us... yet at the same time the single most destructive force, equally able to destroy an individual's mind as it is to tear down the walls of Troy. So, naturally, love is also one of the driving forces in several of the plays we've seen so far in Russia.

It makes sense for love to be such a common characteristic in theater, as it’s such a common feeling in the human mind that can manifest itself in many more ways than just romantic, and since it creates some of the most fascinating characters. It’s so easy to connect to those feelings in some way or another, yet even despite that, I see a very typical response among an audience when watching a conflicted couple on the stage or screen.

“Why did he think that’s a good idea?” “Doesn’t he know that won’t impress her?” “Why can’t he just calm down and relax?” and my personal favorite, “I would never do that to the person I love.”

Now, most of you reading this have seen the plays I’m talking about, namely something like Mitya’s Love or Chekhov’s The Seagull. We’ve all seen some of the things these characters have done in the name of their “love.” I don’t excuse Mitya’s subtle attempts at emotional manipulation of Katya because he can’t handle her having a life outside of him. I don’t agree with Treplev presenting Nina with a deceased bird in some desperate attempt to prove his love to her.

But I understand it. As much as I hate to say it, I understand all too well, because their love has grown toxic and they’ve become obsessed. Obsession is the point when something that means more than the world to you becomes inaccessible to you, and the feeling when you realize this but are unable to do anything about it is what makes these characters do these awful things. After all, there is no great love without great jealousy, and sometimes that jealousy will take over. It’s taken me over before.

Perhaps you’re reading this and thinking, “I’m sorry it happened to you Sean, but it won’t happen to me because I know better.” Of course it will happen to you. You might not obsess over another person, maybe something seemingly insignificant, in which case it’s not as severe and destructive to others, but it’s still the same thought process. 

Hel hath no fury like a woman’s scorn. Have you ever felt something so powerful as that? When you love them so much and you can’t understand why they’d be treating you with such disdain, that unbearable desire for everything to just be okay again… it will tear you apart like nothing you’ve ever experienced. Perhaps the things your lover is doing aren’t bad or even outwardly mean spirited, but you’ve acquired such a toxic and illogical mindset that you overthink and overanalyze what they do to the point where they’re actions seem like an active attack against you. It will make you shoot down a seagull in complete clarity of thought because you genuinely think it will make things better. These people on the stage who we’ve come to so readily judge, they’re just us. They’re probably a personal experience the playwright has had, which is why they’re so visceral to us.

I’ve heard time and time again, on tumblr, in poems, in movies, in everything, that love is pain. Love is not pain, obsession is pain. Obsession is an unfortunately too common side of love, which is how they get confused too easily. So, seeing these characters on stage do such appalling things because they’ve become so obsessed… it just makes me want to cry. I see so much of myself in them, I can even see myself doing the things they’re doing, and that’s scary. However, it’s the reality we all face. So do not judge these characters, learn from them. Understand them. In the times where I was lost in obsession, I so desperately craved someone to understand what got me there so they could pull me out in a way I could no longer do for myself. Hell, you don’t even need to be obsessed to feel something like that. Still, if only we could do that to the characters on stage.

Then again, if we did, there’d be no spectacle. After all, few things are as spellbinding to watch unfold as a tragic obsession.